Mini Story #2 - Uncle Adolphus

Then Mrs Healy said, "Do you remember poor old Uncle Adolphus?" Mr Healy, who was just beginning to get rather comfortable in his recliner, balancing a newspaper atop his whale of a belly, said no. Although he might as well have said yes - he had settled into his paper and the question had come to him like a fly which he had brushed away absentmindedly. Mrs Healy - zealously crocheting - said that she vaguely remembered him - she had been quite little of course -, but that she did recall that he had an impeccable beard and quite an impressive moustache. He was a very nice man, she added, pausing briefly to scrutinize the mysterious item she had pieced together (which Thomas thought was beginning to look like an angry dog with a lopsided head). "Well Uncle Adolphus," - trilled Mrs. Healy, fingers swiftly manipulating the crochet hook once again -, "had been terribly fond of cricket. He used to practice on the front lawn with some of the other gentlemen whenever Aunt Maud's back was turned. One of the fellows had a cricket bat and we'd often see Uncle Adolphus - and mind you, he was a sizable fellow" - at this Mrs Healy threw meaningful glance at the partially obscured face of Mr. Healy - "running back and forth and flailing his arms up to catch the little hard cricket balls. Jane and I were quite afraid of injury so we steered clear away. Poor Aunty Maud! She'd come out to the porch, cheeks all a-flush and yell 'Mr. Adolphus! That ball breaks a window and you'll never come two shakes near another one 'till I personally hurl one at you m'self!' And Uncle Adolphus would go as red as the cricket balls, apologize to his gentleman friends, and hurry on in soon after. I remember that well - Aunt Maud was much younger then. Then the war started and we didn't see him after that.

"Then one day we're sitting in the dining room doing needlepoint (Jane was muttering at how the needle seemed to find its way into her fingertips quite well but kept missing the board), when we heard a knock at the door. After a while Miss Bow walked in quite stricken-looking and explained that there was sad news. Apparently they had received a telegram about Uncle Adolphus. He had been fighting in the trenches. There was heated fire from both sides, and at one point a grenade was thrown straight where Uncle Adolphus was standing. Now, it might have been Uncle Adolphus thought himself back in Aunty Maud's backyard or that he felt nostalgic for his old game, we'll never know. But what does he do raise up his hands and catch it. It was tragic (but a very good catch, one of the men said later). Needless to say Aunty Maud was in a terrible state.
We tried to comfort her but she kept bawling that it was her fault. Poor Aunty Maud! She explained that the day Uncle Adolphus left had been frightfully chilly and that he had gone off without his coat on. She was sobbing, saying how she had sharply told him that he'd "catch his death" and now he had."

At this Mr. Healy bent down a corner of his newspaper and eyed Mrs. Healy. "You seriously can't acknowledge such nonsense," he wheezed. But it was too late. Thomas was already doubled over in laughter on the carpet floor.
Mrs Healy frowned and her crocheting picked up speed. "It's perfectly true and there's nothing to laugh about," she said. And she explained how, a few weeks later, they had received a plaque in commemoration of Uncle Adolphus, who had met a "…Most Unfortunate Demise Attempting to Intercept the Line of Fire."